Hi! Just a quick note that in the original email of this newsletter I made a truly nightmare typo - writing "'I am not *a* trans" instead of "I am not trans".
This comes down to me being my own editor, and missing very silly things.
It's frustrating, as I re-read this a lot making sure I got it right... and an "a" slips in. Which is just a really rude way of phrasing things.
In hindsight, I am not sure how this happened - I may have edited out "person" - that is my best bet, but regardless, it was a lame mistake to make.
One thing I would like to do if Webworm gets big enough is be able to bring on a paid editor, purely to get in there for grammar and spelling. One day. That is my aim with this project!
Man, Lexie's fucking awesome. I want to be as thick-skinned as her when reading those types of comments.
As a trans person myself, seeing how hard trans women have it absolutely breaks my heart. It's clear there are people out there who are simply misinformed about the trans experience, but there comes a certain point where it goes past ignorance. There are people who have such a vehement hatred for others who are just trying to be themselves, and it honestly scares me. Scares me enough that it's pushed me way back into the closet.
And to David, your self-reflection about your own prejudices was powerful. I too, had my own, joking about identifying as an attack helicopter when I was a naive pre-teen (surprise surprise, I now identify as a trans masculine person. Karma I guess.) It goes without being said that there is always hope for others to change, even if it takes longer than you want it to. So don't beat yourself up too much about it if you think you aren't as progressive as you thought you were. We're all still learning.
Anyone who reads this, please just have some basic human decency and respect trans people. It's not that fucking hard.
as a trans person i find it incredibly disheartening and honestly infuriating to see all this, and we see it all the time.
i’m in the US and they’ve been passing wave after wave of anti-trans legislation when it comes to trans folks competing in sports.
and this crap doesn’t just hurt us. Two cis women from Namibia have been disqualified from competing in the 400 meters race in the Olympics. This isn’t just an attack on trans folks, it’s deep rooted misogyny that punishes all women for not fitting some arbitrary ideal that some old, white, cis dudes came up with while patting each other on the back for being progressive.
We celebrate Olympic champions like Michael Phelps. He's the best swimmer. By the very nature of the Olympics, we consider being the best swimmer a Positive trait, something worth celebrating. However, in order to be the best, you've got to be given these favorable genetic features, like flipper feet and height. Couldn't one argue that by celebrating being the best swimmer, we are also celebrating ones genetics and these genetic traits? Is that not just another weird form of eugenics? Doesn't that bother people?? And if we are content with celebrating genetic advantages, then doesn't that get back to the classic Men are Objectively Better bullshit? Cause all it really is is just a handful of genetic advantages (Y chr. instead of X chr.), right?
Obviously there are also an infinite number of non-genetic circumstances that one must stumble upon to wind up The Best at anything too. Like, being in the right place and the right time and meeting the right people who encourage you to do the right things, ALL ontop of these genetic features.
But isn't that also silly to celebrate? I mean, why do we fucking care who is the best at these random actions anyway? Swimming? When is that even functionally useful?
So then when we get cases like the woman who naturally produced "prohibited" levels of testosterone, or we have a trans athlete, or any intersex individual, where are they supposed to compete? What should be our "binning" system to make sports "fair"? Cause it sure seems like sports can never be fair to me. Sports are about celebrating unfairness. Inequality.
Regardless, it's obvious that most of the discourse is not really about equality either, it's mostly just transphobia. But every time this debate comes along, I always think "Why are we caring about sports in the first place?"
Thank you so much for writing this! I almost cried with relief to see someone standing up for trans humans. I am privileged enough to work with trans people at various stages of their transition and they are so vulnerable, and I just love them. They're the bravest people I know. I recently spoke up in the local paper and NOBODY else did. I just got chastised by old white men. And it made me sad for all the lovely trans rangatahi in Gisborne who might read it. I find it really upsetting. Here's a link if you want to read, but I understand if you can't take anymore https://www.gisborneherald.co.nz/column/20210630/who-are-the-deniers/
I think the most powerful part was your reflection David that this thinking used to be yours. And came from pain and confusion and fear. But you challenged it and still do challenge any thoughts that you suspect might come from reflexive bias rather than compassion and care. Its means that its possible to grow and change and learn and be better. And we need to be reminded of that a lot as it often feels hopeless when the sheer volume of arseholes with a platform gets overwhelming. Thank you ❤
Please tell Lexie how wonderful this is. I just want to echo how impressive it is that she can persevere in just everyday life, but also withstand it enough to read things like this and not totally collapse. Not only does she not collapse, but she does quite the opposite and is an awesome, talented, person! I really appreciate your approach on this, similarly to the post on sex work from a bit ago -- glad you are talking to so many people and sharing their wisdom!
So many of these comments are vile. It grinds my gears to hear people who would have an aneurysm if somebody mis-gendered them deliberately referring to others by the wrong gender.
Not to in anyway legitimise these comments because they are all very clearly transphobic garbage, but I don’t think we should label all people who discuss the complexities of gender and sport transphobic. It’s a really important debate that I think actually helps us shape our understanding and definition of gender as a society.
I have complicated thoughts about it. Because the reason we have gender-based sport is due to a very real biological difference between men and women’s hormones and bodies. Without the division, women would largely be unable to participate in sport in the same way - and especially at higher levels.
If it was just about gender then there would really be no reason to separate men and women. Because gender really has nothing to do with hormones and bodies. Really this is about sex - the chromosomes and hormones and genitals etc etc.
The problem is sex isn’t binary either. There are many women with high levels of testosterone naturally - is it unfair if they compete? There are also people with irregular chromosomes. Where do they fit? Even if these things are less common in the general population, the higher level we rise with sport, the more we (probably) see these non-binary examples.
Ultimately though I agree 100% that these conversations need to happen between experts and people who know what they are talking about. Not from general members of the public who have no idea what they are talking about (like me).
So I just really don’t know and I’m fully open to being wrong. I especially would welcome a trans individual to tell me I’m an idiot if I am being an idiot. Not that it’s their job to do so but I will try my best to listen if somebody has the decency to teach me
One thing that blows my mind is the people out there that think a trans person would "jump ship", so to speak, purely for the competitive advantage they perceive the person will get. There isn't a person in the world that would sign up for the sort of garbage and hate trans people have to endure to win something.
At the risk of being vulnerable to strangers, I subscribed to a similar viewpoint to comment #7 in the past - that was because I didn't understand anything about the trans population and essentially thought they were making it up, not to mention the fact I horribly overstated my understanding of endocrinology. I was recommended Contrapoints (Natalie Wynn - check it out) for some philosophical stuff and she really opened my eyes to this and more.
I still don't know much about hormonal systems but I've grown to understand that it's bigger than that and it's about accepting people for who they are, how they see themselves and supporting people through all their endeavours. My journey continues and I hope Laurel kicks some serious ass in Tokyo!
Cis person here. Just feel compelled to say something about the Jo comment. Whilst I in no way blame Lexie or any trans person for reacting like that to what must be a deluge, I think Jo's comment doesn't deserve to be sandwiched with the rest.
I was Jo once, or rather I thought I was. I wasn't confident enough to espouse it, but I thought it. I was scientifically ignorant, I wasn't "mindless." To be clear I, 100% support inclusion now but it's really not intuitive that potentially decades of development physiologically as a male wouldn't offer a significant advantage. Ihad to educate myself, this stuff wasn't taught.
I hope it's in the curriculum now but scientific illiteracy as a defence is a relatively reasonable one I think (how much would you know about climate change or animal sentience would you know if you weren't taught it?)... Of course if the Jo's and Mes of the world push back against the science or don't want to listen then fuck em, the "mindless" charge stands.
Fairly shocking to see the amount of hate that is being vented against trans gender people. The fact that it all comes from a hotbed of ignorance is all the more galling! That the same stuff is directed against gay people is just as bad. I sometimes take these haters on face to face, and am never surprised to find that they are in fact not very bright nor well socialised, and often of religious persuasion. They never seem to be aware of what they don't know, nor are keen to check the facts before taking a stand. The fact that Trans and gay men at least don't choose to be who they are because of biological things beyond anyone's control is not a good thing to say to these idiots as it can set them off! I must admit that I do enjoy this bit as they have no factual comeback, and tend to struggle to put a sentence together. I guess it's a little easier for me though as I am a straight 61YO pale stale male, and bigger than most.
I've always thought that the a lot of the hatred of trans women lies in the fear straight, cis-men have of being attracted to a trans woman. It's incredible that they managed to sell this fear to cis-women who consider themselves feminists as a fear of trans women taking over sports. No one puts themselves through the life of a trans woman if it's not who they truly are. The number of women who make a living as athletes is so small that it's laughable, no one's living is really being threatened. I hate how gullible these TERFS are and how much hurt they are spreading to save some fragile dude from worrying that someday he's going to be "tricked" by a beautiful trans woman.
I am so mad about so much of the public discourse around trans rights at the moment. So much of it is ridiculous straw man arguments from people who don't give a crap about women's rights 364 days of the year but are suddenly feminists if it means they get to stick the boot in to transgender people. The rest seems to be from terfs and I honestly can't make any sense of their point of view at all.
Much love to all trans people at this time. I'm a sensitive soul and I can't do twitter or online comment sections that don't feel safe - and I'm aware that I have the privilege to avoid this and not have it seek me out, f**k that must suck!! But please know that there are ordinary (or delightfully wierd) New Zealanders that recognise your humanity, are horrified by how you are treated, and are having quiet conversations in private to increase acceptance and make your lives 🏳️⚧️
This was amazing. The way Lexie broke it all down, and the responses…and also your honesty. This is why I subscribe - to have access to intelligent information and responses, not the ignorance shared in social and mainstream media. I’m in awe, and I’m so much more enlightened now. I can’t even comprehend how it would feel to be celebrating your own effort and achievement for making it into something like the Olympics and to not have wholehearted support from your country.
This is great, absolutely the right thing to hand over the article to a trans woman, wish more people did that. Also agree that one of the best things we can do is constantly challenge how we react to people. And regarding that fear of our own prejudices and whether we can unlearn them - your follow-up thoughts, and self correction if necessary, matter much more and speak more to your character than your brain’s initial reflex reaction.
This was by far the most reasoned, light hearted and enlightening text on the discussion of trans rights that I've read. Despite the deeply seriousness nature of the topic. Like you David I grew up in a religious environment (a cult of sorts) and have worked my whole life to prise off the armour of fear I've worn since a child. Thank you David for providing the platform and thank you Lexie for taking the time to explain in succinct language the complexity yet pure clarity of your position as a Trans athlete. Your words opened doors and actually gave me the internal counter argument I needed to deflect the Trans hatred and ignorance.
Hi! Just a quick note that in the original email of this newsletter I made a truly nightmare typo - writing "'I am not *a* trans" instead of "I am not trans".
This comes down to me being my own editor, and missing very silly things.
It's frustrating, as I re-read this a lot making sure I got it right... and an "a" slips in. Which is just a really rude way of phrasing things.
In hindsight, I am not sure how this happened - I may have edited out "person" - that is my best bet, but regardless, it was a lame mistake to make.
One thing I would like to do if Webworm gets big enough is be able to bring on a paid editor, purely to get in there for grammar and spelling. One day. That is my aim with this project!
Much aroha
And thanks for all your beautiful feedback.
David
Man, Lexie's fucking awesome. I want to be as thick-skinned as her when reading those types of comments.
As a trans person myself, seeing how hard trans women have it absolutely breaks my heart. It's clear there are people out there who are simply misinformed about the trans experience, but there comes a certain point where it goes past ignorance. There are people who have such a vehement hatred for others who are just trying to be themselves, and it honestly scares me. Scares me enough that it's pushed me way back into the closet.
And to David, your self-reflection about your own prejudices was powerful. I too, had my own, joking about identifying as an attack helicopter when I was a naive pre-teen (surprise surprise, I now identify as a trans masculine person. Karma I guess.) It goes without being said that there is always hope for others to change, even if it takes longer than you want it to. So don't beat yourself up too much about it if you think you aren't as progressive as you thought you were. We're all still learning.
Anyone who reads this, please just have some basic human decency and respect trans people. It's not that fucking hard.
-Sincerely, a terrified trans teen xx
as a trans person i find it incredibly disheartening and honestly infuriating to see all this, and we see it all the time.
i’m in the US and they’ve been passing wave after wave of anti-trans legislation when it comes to trans folks competing in sports.
and this crap doesn’t just hurt us. Two cis women from Namibia have been disqualified from competing in the 400 meters race in the Olympics. This isn’t just an attack on trans folks, it’s deep rooted misogyny that punishes all women for not fitting some arbitrary ideal that some old, white, cis dudes came up with while patting each other on the back for being progressive.
it sucks and i’m over it.
Great read. Thanks Lexie & David.
Here is my hot take:
We celebrate Olympic champions like Michael Phelps. He's the best swimmer. By the very nature of the Olympics, we consider being the best swimmer a Positive trait, something worth celebrating. However, in order to be the best, you've got to be given these favorable genetic features, like flipper feet and height. Couldn't one argue that by celebrating being the best swimmer, we are also celebrating ones genetics and these genetic traits? Is that not just another weird form of eugenics? Doesn't that bother people?? And if we are content with celebrating genetic advantages, then doesn't that get back to the classic Men are Objectively Better bullshit? Cause all it really is is just a handful of genetic advantages (Y chr. instead of X chr.), right?
Obviously there are also an infinite number of non-genetic circumstances that one must stumble upon to wind up The Best at anything too. Like, being in the right place and the right time and meeting the right people who encourage you to do the right things, ALL ontop of these genetic features.
But isn't that also silly to celebrate? I mean, why do we fucking care who is the best at these random actions anyway? Swimming? When is that even functionally useful?
So then when we get cases like the woman who naturally produced "prohibited" levels of testosterone, or we have a trans athlete, or any intersex individual, where are they supposed to compete? What should be our "binning" system to make sports "fair"? Cause it sure seems like sports can never be fair to me. Sports are about celebrating unfairness. Inequality.
Regardless, it's obvious that most of the discourse is not really about equality either, it's mostly just transphobia. But every time this debate comes along, I always think "Why are we caring about sports in the first place?"
Thank you so much for writing this! I almost cried with relief to see someone standing up for trans humans. I am privileged enough to work with trans people at various stages of their transition and they are so vulnerable, and I just love them. They're the bravest people I know. I recently spoke up in the local paper and NOBODY else did. I just got chastised by old white men. And it made me sad for all the lovely trans rangatahi in Gisborne who might read it. I find it really upsetting. Here's a link if you want to read, but I understand if you can't take anymore https://www.gisborneherald.co.nz/column/20210630/who-are-the-deniers/
Such a useful piece. Lexie is awesome :)
I think the most powerful part was your reflection David that this thinking used to be yours. And came from pain and confusion and fear. But you challenged it and still do challenge any thoughts that you suspect might come from reflexive bias rather than compassion and care. Its means that its possible to grow and change and learn and be better. And we need to be reminded of that a lot as it often feels hopeless when the sheer volume of arseholes with a platform gets overwhelming. Thank you ❤
Please tell Lexie how wonderful this is. I just want to echo how impressive it is that she can persevere in just everyday life, but also withstand it enough to read things like this and not totally collapse. Not only does she not collapse, but she does quite the opposite and is an awesome, talented, person! I really appreciate your approach on this, similarly to the post on sex work from a bit ago -- glad you are talking to so many people and sharing their wisdom!
So many of these comments are vile. It grinds my gears to hear people who would have an aneurysm if somebody mis-gendered them deliberately referring to others by the wrong gender.
Not to in anyway legitimise these comments because they are all very clearly transphobic garbage, but I don’t think we should label all people who discuss the complexities of gender and sport transphobic. It’s a really important debate that I think actually helps us shape our understanding and definition of gender as a society.
I have complicated thoughts about it. Because the reason we have gender-based sport is due to a very real biological difference between men and women’s hormones and bodies. Without the division, women would largely be unable to participate in sport in the same way - and especially at higher levels.
If it was just about gender then there would really be no reason to separate men and women. Because gender really has nothing to do with hormones and bodies. Really this is about sex - the chromosomes and hormones and genitals etc etc.
The problem is sex isn’t binary either. There are many women with high levels of testosterone naturally - is it unfair if they compete? There are also people with irregular chromosomes. Where do they fit? Even if these things are less common in the general population, the higher level we rise with sport, the more we (probably) see these non-binary examples.
Ultimately though I agree 100% that these conversations need to happen between experts and people who know what they are talking about. Not from general members of the public who have no idea what they are talking about (like me).
So I just really don’t know and I’m fully open to being wrong. I especially would welcome a trans individual to tell me I’m an idiot if I am being an idiot. Not that it’s their job to do so but I will try my best to listen if somebody has the decency to teach me
One thing that blows my mind is the people out there that think a trans person would "jump ship", so to speak, purely for the competitive advantage they perceive the person will get. There isn't a person in the world that would sign up for the sort of garbage and hate trans people have to endure to win something.
At the risk of being vulnerable to strangers, I subscribed to a similar viewpoint to comment #7 in the past - that was because I didn't understand anything about the trans population and essentially thought they were making it up, not to mention the fact I horribly overstated my understanding of endocrinology. I was recommended Contrapoints (Natalie Wynn - check it out) for some philosophical stuff and she really opened my eyes to this and more.
I still don't know much about hormonal systems but I've grown to understand that it's bigger than that and it's about accepting people for who they are, how they see themselves and supporting people through all their endeavours. My journey continues and I hope Laurel kicks some serious ass in Tokyo!
Cis person here. Just feel compelled to say something about the Jo comment. Whilst I in no way blame Lexie or any trans person for reacting like that to what must be a deluge, I think Jo's comment doesn't deserve to be sandwiched with the rest.
I was Jo once, or rather I thought I was. I wasn't confident enough to espouse it, but I thought it. I was scientifically ignorant, I wasn't "mindless." To be clear I, 100% support inclusion now but it's really not intuitive that potentially decades of development physiologically as a male wouldn't offer a significant advantage. Ihad to educate myself, this stuff wasn't taught.
I hope it's in the curriculum now but scientific illiteracy as a defence is a relatively reasonable one I think (how much would you know about climate change or animal sentience would you know if you weren't taught it?)... Of course if the Jo's and Mes of the world push back against the science or don't want to listen then fuck em, the "mindless" charge stands.
Fairly shocking to see the amount of hate that is being vented against trans gender people. The fact that it all comes from a hotbed of ignorance is all the more galling! That the same stuff is directed against gay people is just as bad. I sometimes take these haters on face to face, and am never surprised to find that they are in fact not very bright nor well socialised, and often of religious persuasion. They never seem to be aware of what they don't know, nor are keen to check the facts before taking a stand. The fact that Trans and gay men at least don't choose to be who they are because of biological things beyond anyone's control is not a good thing to say to these idiots as it can set them off! I must admit that I do enjoy this bit as they have no factual comeback, and tend to struggle to put a sentence together. I guess it's a little easier for me though as I am a straight 61YO pale stale male, and bigger than most.
I've always thought that the a lot of the hatred of trans women lies in the fear straight, cis-men have of being attracted to a trans woman. It's incredible that they managed to sell this fear to cis-women who consider themselves feminists as a fear of trans women taking over sports. No one puts themselves through the life of a trans woman if it's not who they truly are. The number of women who make a living as athletes is so small that it's laughable, no one's living is really being threatened. I hate how gullible these TERFS are and how much hurt they are spreading to save some fragile dude from worrying that someday he's going to be "tricked" by a beautiful trans woman.
Lexie is incredible!
I also read this amazing piece by MMA athlete Rosi Sexton who has reversed her opinion on trans women competing.
https://www.outsports.com/2021/6/16/22536714/rosi-sexton-mma-trans-athletes-fallon-fox
I am so mad about so much of the public discourse around trans rights at the moment. So much of it is ridiculous straw man arguments from people who don't give a crap about women's rights 364 days of the year but are suddenly feminists if it means they get to stick the boot in to transgender people. The rest seems to be from terfs and I honestly can't make any sense of their point of view at all.
Much love to all trans people at this time. I'm a sensitive soul and I can't do twitter or online comment sections that don't feel safe - and I'm aware that I have the privilege to avoid this and not have it seek me out, f**k that must suck!! But please know that there are ordinary (or delightfully wierd) New Zealanders that recognise your humanity, are horrified by how you are treated, and are having quiet conversations in private to increase acceptance and make your lives 🏳️⚧️
This was amazing. The way Lexie broke it all down, and the responses…and also your honesty. This is why I subscribe - to have access to intelligent information and responses, not the ignorance shared in social and mainstream media. I’m in awe, and I’m so much more enlightened now. I can’t even comprehend how it would feel to be celebrating your own effort and achievement for making it into something like the Olympics and to not have wholehearted support from your country.
This is great, absolutely the right thing to hand over the article to a trans woman, wish more people did that. Also agree that one of the best things we can do is constantly challenge how we react to people. And regarding that fear of our own prejudices and whether we can unlearn them - your follow-up thoughts, and self correction if necessary, matter much more and speak more to your character than your brain’s initial reflex reaction.
This was by far the most reasoned, light hearted and enlightening text on the discussion of trans rights that I've read. Despite the deeply seriousness nature of the topic. Like you David I grew up in a religious environment (a cult of sorts) and have worked my whole life to prise off the armour of fear I've worn since a child. Thank you David for providing the platform and thank you Lexie for taking the time to explain in succinct language the complexity yet pure clarity of your position as a Trans athlete. Your words opened doors and actually gave me the internal counter argument I needed to deflect the Trans hatred and ignorance.