The thing about autism, is it does not stop people from learning.
There are appropriate and inappropriate behaviours and we who are autistic can learn the difference. It takes more time for some than others because there's a wide net on autism and the way it impacts folk, and I acknowledge my kid and I are both the kind of autistic who gets privileged in these conversations, but with time (and care and occupational therapy and support) people can and do learn.
Autism is never a pass to be a creep - or as we've seen in recent weeks, a pass to full blown fascism. It is never a pass to hurt someone, it is never a pass to do harm. It can be a reason, it's totally not an excuse.
Fake Seizure Guy can get a good weighted blanket and stop creeping on strangers. And if this is truly stimming like his "mate" says, he's been criminally let down by the people around him who are meant to support him, this friend included.
I couldn’t agree more. Learning is growing, and we cannot grow without learning. When I received my autism diagnosis in 2002, I wanted to learn everything I could about how to navigate the world as an autistic adult; that included how to “fit in.”
Whenever I hear about someone using autism as an excuse for inappropriate behavior, there’s a really good chance that they’re not on the spectrum at all.
I am sure I am not the only autistic person who is royally sick of men, and it's always men, blaming their inappropriate and/or illegal behaviour on autism. Chuck a fake seizure to get strangers to touch you in ways they would not otherwise be consenting to - autism. Sexually assault your employee, fans and other vulnerable women - autism. Rant about Hitler and somehow compel your clearly uncomfortable partner to appear naked in public - autism. Throw a Nazi salute on a stage being watched by most of the world - autism. It's all lies.
Hands up if you're an autistic person who has never done any of the above problematic behaviours. Hands up if you're an autistic person who has been shunned, bullied or abused for the TINIEST of habits you have to cope with overstimulation. You'll find most of the same hands in the air for both.
It's almost always white cis men who are using their autism as an excuse to do horrendous shit. As an autistic person who does seek out deep pressure stimulation... I bought a fucking weighted blanket. I don't go around asking strangers to sit on me!
Your recent emails about politics and sexual trafficking are terrifically important, as is this update about unacceptable social behaviors. (My son is autistic; and people like this guy's "friend" are doing the community a huge disservice.) But, while I found it easy to check <like> for today's email, it's really difficult for me to do the same for the journalism on wide-scale social criminality, no matter how important and well-reported. Perhaps this is because I feel as though local criminal behaviors can be regulated through public awareness, while I despair that any amount of attention to and analysis of Geist-level misanthropy is like shouting in a vacuum. There is virtually no impact no matter how much energy is put into it. That is my feeling not my belief. Which is all to say, I wish there was an alternative to the heart-shaped <like> button at the bottom of your emails. Maybe a fist-shaped button labeled <still fighting the good fight>. Or something more pithy. 😉 Thanks again for your excellent work. All the best 👍
This is great news, David. No matter the outcome of the charges, your reporting has brought this person to the attention of the police and may stop his preying on warm hearted people. I’m epileptic and sitting on someone who is having a seizure is not advised. Thanks for publishing the guidelines of what to do
Ewwww at using an ABA person as some kind of authority on autism. If they were one, they wouldn't be studying ABA. Yes it's controversial, because it's cruel.
Why hear what someone thinks most autistic people would say about stimming when you can just ask an autistic person, anyway? From my reading posts by parents, some autistic children definitely use their parents' bodies to stim, twirling on their hair, squishing their earlobes etc.
Long time reader, first time poster here. Appreciate you, your insights, and investigations.
Big ups for posting info on how to assist someone having a seizure. As the sister of a person who suffers big ol' seizures on a pretty regular basis, I'm always fretting my brother will get the help he needs in these moments. It's heartening to have it highlighted. Thank you.
Lots of love from a Narrm/Melbourne dwelling, Te Puke-raised, ex-faith wahine.
Thanks, Katie. I never had to help anyone with a seizure - you seem the opposite (and your sibling is lucky to have you!) - so yeah, seemed important to get down what to *actually do*.
Tangential but thank you for pointing out the controversial nature of ABA. Another green flag (in a sea of green flags) that you're doing due diligence where necessary!
Honestly, my first thought wasn’t the sitting, but the willingness to writhe around on city streets. Thinking of that makes me 🤢. Then my thought went to the poor sweet people being manipulated into doing something they thought was helping, but were instead being used to scratch someone’s fetish itch-also, 🤮.
I hope this results in this man getting some therapy.
This outcome must feel rewarding! Great reporting!
Also, there are *definitely* spaces in the kink/fetish community where he can go and get sat on, consensually! But after this I doubt he'd be welcomed with open arms 😑
Hard agree. What is it for? The trams? I don't get it! My friend had to coach me through it.. if they weren't there, what would have happened to me? They make no sense!
Bloody hell listening to this this morning & I asked Bob (Aussie) 'Can you remember when we were driving in Melbourne & those crazy traffic lights & lane switching stuff happened? We're they the hook turns David is referring to?'
Yep that was them & I thought I HAD suppressed all memory of the horror...until now 😆 lol cheers David!
Yup, so you don't block a tram. They're quite easy! Just go into the left hand lane, wait for the green light in the direction you are going (not the one you are in) and off you go again.
Cyclists around NZ have the *opportunity* to do them too on busy roads where getting into the right-hand lane to turn right would be suicidal. There are usually little green boxes to show you where to sit and wait. Otherwise same rules as for cars and trams. Though amusingly (not!) there is only ever space for one cyclist at a time in t e box...so I guess road designers don;t understand cycling...as usual.
I wonder if this had anything to do with your reporting, David, or if the police felt that the most recent incidents crossed some theoretical line into a space they thought was chargeable.
Either way, I hope everyone is okay and that anyone who needs support - victims or FSG himself, if appropriate - receive it.
From what I can tell, the incidents have been largely the same for over a decade.
Either my reporting made people realise they could make a complaint over this - or police decided to do something. Or there is another factor that has changed recently that I have not clocked.
I can't say about this situation, but there does seem to be a continual perspective shift over the last number of years to take things that were previously just written off and now consider them more significant. I was watching an old "8 out of 10 Cats" and as they were talking about someone recently charged with sexual assault (that had been doing similar things for an extended period of time) Sean Lock mentioned something like "that's always been around but was just dismissed - back in the 1970s they just called that Wandering Hands". Those societal perspective changes over time might also be coming to play here, where something that used to be dismissed/ignored is now being looked at differently with a more critical eye.
It must be a strange/discomfiting feeling to influence events like this, even though it was clearly inevitable and should probably have happened a long time ago.
My roommate in college had grand mal seizures. From my experience witnessing and helping my friend during and after a seizure is that he was not able to talk to me during or for several minutes afterwards. After his seizure his breathing would slow down and he would slowly come to. He would sometimes walk around but was not fully conscious, he couldn’t make out words and would fumble from room to room (kind of like cavemen are depicted in old movies). This lasted for about 30 minutes. Then at some point when he regained consciousness he would not have remembered any of the previous events.
I know there are different kinds of seizures but I find it hard to believe that anyone truly experiencing one would be able to communicate during. I hope this man gets the help he needs, for his safety and the safety of others.
I'm really glad to read this - and so glad for the PSA at the end. A lot of folks want to call an ambulance immediately for anyone having a seizure. Especially in America, those with epilepsy can tell you please do NOT do this right away. Ambulances are so expensive and most seizures resolve in under 5 minutes, so the added cost of emergency services will be yet another burden (my son has used to have seizures daily; it's more like weekly now).
It still pains me that people do this sort of thing and the result is that some folks who really do have seizures get accused of faking it. Just FYI - it's VERY possible to for a person to be conscious when having a seizure - my son has been having them for 17 years, and he's always conscious. He also gets back to "normal" pretty quickly once its finished. He just can't really speak or control himself in any way while it's happening.
Again, really glad you followed up on this story. I hope he doesn't do this to anyone else while he's out before his court date, but knowing human nature, I'm not super optimistic.
The thing about autism, is it does not stop people from learning.
There are appropriate and inappropriate behaviours and we who are autistic can learn the difference. It takes more time for some than others because there's a wide net on autism and the way it impacts folk, and I acknowledge my kid and I are both the kind of autistic who gets privileged in these conversations, but with time (and care and occupational therapy and support) people can and do learn.
Autism is never a pass to be a creep - or as we've seen in recent weeks, a pass to full blown fascism. It is never a pass to hurt someone, it is never a pass to do harm. It can be a reason, it's totally not an excuse.
Fake Seizure Guy can get a good weighted blanket and stop creeping on strangers. And if this is truly stimming like his "mate" says, he's been criminally let down by the people around him who are meant to support him, this friend included.
I couldn’t agree more. Learning is growing, and we cannot grow without learning. When I received my autism diagnosis in 2002, I wanted to learn everything I could about how to navigate the world as an autistic adult; that included how to “fit in.”
Whenever I hear about someone using autism as an excuse for inappropriate behavior, there’s a really good chance that they’re not on the spectrum at all.
Tautoko, Scout.
I am sure I am not the only autistic person who is royally sick of men, and it's always men, blaming their inappropriate and/or illegal behaviour on autism. Chuck a fake seizure to get strangers to touch you in ways they would not otherwise be consenting to - autism. Sexually assault your employee, fans and other vulnerable women - autism. Rant about Hitler and somehow compel your clearly uncomfortable partner to appear naked in public - autism. Throw a Nazi salute on a stage being watched by most of the world - autism. It's all lies.
Hands up if you're an autistic person who has never done any of the above problematic behaviours. Hands up if you're an autistic person who has been shunned, bullied or abused for the TINIEST of habits you have to cope with overstimulation. You'll find most of the same hands in the air for both.
Pinning this.
It's almost always white cis men who are using their autism as an excuse to do horrendous shit. As an autistic person who does seek out deep pressure stimulation... I bought a fucking weighted blanket. I don't go around asking strangers to sit on me!
Your recent emails about politics and sexual trafficking are terrifically important, as is this update about unacceptable social behaviors. (My son is autistic; and people like this guy's "friend" are doing the community a huge disservice.) But, while I found it easy to check <like> for today's email, it's really difficult for me to do the same for the journalism on wide-scale social criminality, no matter how important and well-reported. Perhaps this is because I feel as though local criminal behaviors can be regulated through public awareness, while I despair that any amount of attention to and analysis of Geist-level misanthropy is like shouting in a vacuum. There is virtually no impact no matter how much energy is put into it. That is my feeling not my belief. Which is all to say, I wish there was an alternative to the heart-shaped <like> button at the bottom of your emails. Maybe a fist-shaped button labeled <still fighting the good fight>. Or something more pithy. 😉 Thanks again for your excellent work. All the best 👍
this is the most david farrier article ever (this is a compliment)
I'll take it. Investigating this stuff is my fetish, I guess?!
I always wonder, does David find this sort of stuff or does it find him :)
I was thinking exactly the same thing! 🥰 🙌🏼
This is great news, David. No matter the outcome of the charges, your reporting has brought this person to the attention of the police and may stop his preying on warm hearted people. I’m epileptic and sitting on someone who is having a seizure is not advised. Thanks for publishing the guidelines of what to do
Thanks Diane - yes, I thought getting the "what to actual do" out there was a good idea.
He was kinda of walking disinformation machine in regards to what to do when someone suffers a seizure, huh.
David is like a connoisseur of fine fetishists.
I think we've found the slogan for the next Webworm T-shirt.
Ewwww at using an ABA person as some kind of authority on autism. If they were one, they wouldn't be studying ABA. Yes it's controversial, because it's cruel.
Why hear what someone thinks most autistic people would say about stimming when you can just ask an autistic person, anyway? From my reading posts by parents, some autistic children definitely use their parents' bodies to stim, twirling on their hair, squishing their earlobes etc.
1000%. In the future, David, I’d steer well well WELL clear of anyone involved in ABA.
Yes
Gah 😫 really wanna know about this meat lady now. Because eww and/or ick.
In all seriousness though, good job David. Hopefully there's some resolution in the Future for everyone involved.
Hi David,
Long time reader, first time poster here. Appreciate you, your insights, and investigations.
Big ups for posting info on how to assist someone having a seizure. As the sister of a person who suffers big ol' seizures on a pretty regular basis, I'm always fretting my brother will get the help he needs in these moments. It's heartening to have it highlighted. Thank you.
Lots of love from a Narrm/Melbourne dwelling, Te Puke-raised, ex-faith wahine.
Happy Waitangi day! Toitu te tiriti!
K
Thanks, Katie. I never had to help anyone with a seizure - you seem the opposite (and your sibling is lucky to have you!) - so yeah, seemed important to get down what to *actually do*.
Tangential but thank you for pointing out the controversial nature of ABA. Another green flag (in a sea of green flags) that you're doing due diligence where necessary!
Honestly, my first thought wasn’t the sitting, but the willingness to writhe around on city streets. Thinking of that makes me 🤢. Then my thought went to the poor sweet people being manipulated into doing something they thought was helping, but were instead being used to scratch someone’s fetish itch-also, 🤮.
I hope this results in this man getting some therapy.
This outcome must feel rewarding! Great reporting!
Also, there are *definitely* spaces in the kink/fetish community where he can go and get sat on, consensually! But after this I doubt he'd be welcomed with open arms 😑
Excited for hook turns to also be arrested today 🤞🤞🤞
Hard agree. What is it for? The trams? I don't get it! My friend had to coach me through it.. if they weren't there, what would have happened to me? They make no sense!
Bloody hell listening to this this morning & I asked Bob (Aussie) 'Can you remember when we were driving in Melbourne & those crazy traffic lights & lane switching stuff happened? We're they the hook turns David is referring to?'
Yep that was them & I thought I HAD suppressed all memory of the horror...until now 😆 lol cheers David!
Yup, so you don't block a tram. They're quite easy! Just go into the left hand lane, wait for the green light in the direction you are going (not the one you are in) and off you go again.
Cyclists around NZ have the *opportunity* to do them too on busy roads where getting into the right-hand lane to turn right would be suicidal. There are usually little green boxes to show you where to sit and wait. Otherwise same rules as for cars and trams. Though amusingly (not!) there is only ever space for one cyclist at a time in t e box...so I guess road designers don;t understand cycling...as usual.
Huge part of why I DO NOT drive! I mean, I’m also bad at driving and don’t have a car… but the hook turns are scary as hell!
I wonder if this had anything to do with your reporting, David, or if the police felt that the most recent incidents crossed some theoretical line into a space they thought was chargeable.
Either way, I hope everyone is okay and that anyone who needs support - victims or FSG himself, if appropriate - receive it.
From what I can tell, the incidents have been largely the same for over a decade.
Either my reporting made people realise they could make a complaint over this - or police decided to do something. Or there is another factor that has changed recently that I have not clocked.
I can't say about this situation, but there does seem to be a continual perspective shift over the last number of years to take things that were previously just written off and now consider them more significant. I was watching an old "8 out of 10 Cats" and as they were talking about someone recently charged with sexual assault (that had been doing similar things for an extended period of time) Sean Lock mentioned something like "that's always been around but was just dismissed - back in the 1970s they just called that Wandering Hands". Those societal perspective changes over time might also be coming to play here, where something that used to be dismissed/ignored is now being looked at differently with a more critical eye.
It must be a strange/discomfiting feeling to influence events like this, even though it was clearly inevitable and should probably have happened a long time ago.
Mainly I just hope he gets the help he needs, before he does this to someone who reacts in a detrimental way.
My roommate in college had grand mal seizures. From my experience witnessing and helping my friend during and after a seizure is that he was not able to talk to me during or for several minutes afterwards. After his seizure his breathing would slow down and he would slowly come to. He would sometimes walk around but was not fully conscious, he couldn’t make out words and would fumble from room to room (kind of like cavemen are depicted in old movies). This lasted for about 30 minutes. Then at some point when he regained consciousness he would not have remembered any of the previous events.
I know there are different kinds of seizures but I find it hard to believe that anyone truly experiencing one would be able to communicate during. I hope this man gets the help he needs, for his safety and the safety of others.
I'm really glad to read this - and so glad for the PSA at the end. A lot of folks want to call an ambulance immediately for anyone having a seizure. Especially in America, those with epilepsy can tell you please do NOT do this right away. Ambulances are so expensive and most seizures resolve in under 5 minutes, so the added cost of emergency services will be yet another burden (my son has used to have seizures daily; it's more like weekly now).
It still pains me that people do this sort of thing and the result is that some folks who really do have seizures get accused of faking it. Just FYI - it's VERY possible to for a person to be conscious when having a seizure - my son has been having them for 17 years, and he's always conscious. He also gets back to "normal" pretty quickly once its finished. He just can't really speak or control himself in any way while it's happening.
Again, really glad you followed up on this story. I hope he doesn't do this to anyone else while he's out before his court date, but knowing human nature, I'm not super optimistic.
Team Fetish not Facist 😂YAY !!! Sun is shining brighter than Luxons stupid dome 🥚 for Waitangi Day over here in Aotearoa 👍🏽 ☀️ ❤️