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Beck's avatar

I have woken up in Dunedin this morning for the first time in 16 years (flew in after work last night).

I loved this city but left with my boyfriend at the time so he could have a fresh start somewhere different. There were 6 years of abuse that followed that move and I have probably been struggling to reconcile that ever since. Any way, made it back! And like some gift from the universe I'm reading this in bed realizing that my ex was a primary psychopath. I'm not saying that lightly. That was him. And I believed everything he told me because I was sad and broken and didn't find value in myself as I had lost my dad a year or do earlier and was suffering from depression.

So two things, first thank you so much for this knowledge. I feel a weight of something lifted that gives me hope my next 3 days will not feel quite so haunted and may even be a bit nice :)

Second, I bought in to one of these people. As a people leader I have the strange gift of being given regular feedback about my personality/ how I come across to others. Subsequently I am pretty confident in saying I demonstrate empathy, intuition and logic above most other things (which i appreciate kind of sound contradictory but it seems to work haha). But, i spent 6 years hiding my experiences, accepting someone else opinions on every aspect of my life as gospel and punishing myself as often as I was punished by my partner. When I finally left after realizing I might die and decided I didn't want to, it still took me years to tell people what had happened and to lose the shame of what I had "allowed" to happen and my effective support of the situation i showed by staying in it.

My best friend "knew" the whole time. Not the magnitude, but the theme of my reality. All she ever said to me was I will always be here and you deserve better. And finally, one day, I said please come and get me and I think so too.

I love that the theme of so much of this forum- articles, comments, community is continuing to try when things feel hopeless. This has always felt so worthwhile to me and today in this burbled post I guess I have realised why. Its what saved me- other people not giving up on me even when I was busy making home in a rabbit hole dungeon.

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A. Michelle's avatar

This interview comes very well-timed for me, as it was only earlier this week that I was finally able to go back and read all of your QAnon posts. To be honest, I'd been avoiding Webworm since the summer when this became a frequent topic for you. Not personal - I also stopped going on Twitter and watching several hours of MSNBC each night, and instead attempted to replace reality with massive amounts of fantasy fiction. I didn't even realize how avoidant I'd become until this week, a few days after the election was called here in the US, when the air seemed to clear and it felt safe to consume the news again. I don't know if you've had other Americans tell you anything similar, but the shift in my state of my mind over the weekend was massive. I'm not even sure where to go from here.

Anyway, after reading all your QAnon stuff, a debriefing like this interview was definitely in order. I'm a psych person, and the professionalism and insight on Wilson's part are to be highly commended. I wish the MSM would talk to psych pros like this.

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