I have this piece of advice I often give to people that work with me or in my personal life when they are dealing with someone less than pleasant (excuse language): remember that you only need to deal with them being an arsehole for the period of your required interaction, but they have to be a cunt forever and thats actually really sad.
What the hell is Twitter about? I don't get it. How can people posting not be actual people? All this retweeting, blocking and unblocking. What is it's point. Am I really dumber than I think because I just don't get it. If conspiracy theorists can work it out why can't I?
I think this is why I enjoy the comments section on your newsletters so much. It's just so straight forward. #its probablybecauseimoldbutimnotactuallythatild😉
Doing a disservice to toddlers there mate. Most toddlers I know are more open minded and it only takes a biscuit to convince them to change their mind. Although I'm right now trying to convince one that this container doesn't have a door so I can't "open the door" because there isn't one because it's a container 🙄🙄🙄
A good point re not starting up an interaction because of the audience you draw to them. Probably counts more for people who actually have followers. Also a good point to check the account for any posts that reflect that they might actually be a human with >1 interest.
I admit the laughing emojis get to me. Like, the person is so fucking smug about their ignorance. You give them an article that contradicts the claim they're trying to make and they laugh at it, and your quoted excerpt from it, before they've even had a chance to read it. It's so....RUDE.
Ok I had better get that biscuit before the screaming starts.
Jan 16, 2022·edited Jan 16, 2022Liked by David Farrier
I did engage with one of these one-issue conspiracy theorists on Twitter last year. He assured me that the long-term side-effects of the vaccine will start showing up in me soon enough. So I’ve set an annual, reoccurring reminder to give him an update on any ailments I might have picked up over the previous 12 months. Can’t wait to update him on my pulled calf muscle and to see if he thinks that was caused by the vaccine.
Also on Yellowjackets - the night after we watched the pilot, my wife was sleep-talking and said "Melanie's role would be an interesting one to play". So it definitely grabbed us.
Thanks David, another great start to another beautiful day in Aotearoa. Talking of toddlers, we brace ourselves for more stupid protests and junk mail as Voices For Freedom & other idiots ramp up their attacks on the vax children campaign starting nationwide today.
I needed to hear this today! A case I’ve been involved in was wrapped up on Monday and ALL the major media outlets covered it and tweeted/Facebook/news articles everywhere and I found myself reading every single comment and the temptation to reply has been overwhelming, after I realised I’d read 400 replies on one tweet and all the quote tweets and their replies I knew it was time to stop but in this case the sheer amount of victim blaming and people not actually reading the full article was so overwhelming, I can’t imagine what that’s like for you and others in the public eye who will have literally every post scrutinised, you’re a lot more resilient than I am!
Hope you have a great week and enjoyed your horse riding!!
David's post and the other commenting here read like the wise advice of a true social media veterans, those with the scorch marks to show for it. I've never been that much involved with either Twitter or Facebook posts before my engagement with Webworm. It's been an... education.
On one level, engaging has been something of a source of personal and professional curiosity. I now understand the pull and the dopamine-fueled compulsiveness of it all, but if I'm being honest, I don't think I've achieved much of anything beyond that. And I hadn't considered the 'followers seeing the replies' effect. Bleah - who wants THAT noise.
On balance, by not engaging previously, I don't think I was missing that much and both me and the twittersphere are likely far better off if I largely don't. So this was timely advice.
I actually don't do twitter often because it tends to be these one to two para reactive comments that either say nothing or not enough in many cases. The rabid ones are more likely to do this for sure and, if bots, incapable of anything else. On FB though, my inner stirrer emerges and while I don't necessarily engage, I have been known to put up the odd eye roll emoji, or face palm gif, just to give them something to have a screaming fit about and to then ignore or block them. Drives them nuts. It makes me feel slightly better for an instant about having to see some of the the bullsh*t they are spouting. 🙄😏
Really good advice. I dared to laugh at the Manosphere a week ago, the replies were fun, and they tried hard to make me discuss it. I wouldn't, the OP was biologically incorrect information about male and female sex organs (women's wombs are full of loneliness and death apparently 🙄). Nothing to discuss, facts are facts, plus I know it's a waste of time. Most of the time I resist the temptation to rattle idiot boxes but every now and again I can't help myself. As I get older I have much more control over the impulse to react to bollocks online.
What's that old saying, answer a fool and become a fool yourself?
Read a Science article a few years back looking at reward systems of the human brain. It took these classic rewards systems and compared the Endorphins to classic A Class Drugs, Sex and what triggers them in us as Primates and the the links to addiction that govern us, the usual stuff.
What was interesting was their research into Dogmatic types of people who are addicted to arguing as their brain is locked in the 'Pleasure Reward' cycle, Drug, Sex equivalent chemicals drowning their brain ... Kinky.
Thus l have side stepped street evangelical types with that crazy look in their eye, spittle on their lip and spiritual bulge in their pants.
l think modern discourse online is very similar, not really sharing, debate of ideas, something else entirely.
I completely recognise the impulses these replies give; they press us in the exciting values part of the brain and we get a lot of stimulation out of them.
If we respond, and if these people are people and not something else - then all we do by responding is to feed their addiction right back. This is looping feedback and, like microphone feedback, it gets louder and higher pitched. A solution is to turn down the volume. Not responding is a kindness to yourself and to them.
Otherwise, they get more entrenched, we get more entrenched, and together we tug in opposing ways on the fabric that weaves society together.
All addictions have a way of preventing you from contemplating ending them. If quitting twitter is too much to contemplate (I understand, been there), they have a feature where you can *suspend* your account, just to see what it is like. I can recommend it.
I think I missed the memo explaining social media is for engaging with people you don't know, cos I have never done so, despite being an early adopter of various platforms over the years. Went on Twitter about a decade ago cos it seemed like what a good activist did and completely failed to see the point of it so left soon after. So grok everything you say above, as strangers gossiping and bantering and hating should be seen by everyone as just irrelevant to your life.
Loved this! Such a brilliant reminder about checking before you engage and deciding on whether it’s worth it (usually not). But that tweet re Rogan…absolute gold! Normally I’d avoid anything to do with him, but that was totally worth it. Happy Monday!!
Accusing you of hate speech, of all things. Cue The Office’s Michael Scott quote, “Well I hated it a lot.”
I think this guessing game is a much healthier form on non/engagement! I used to keep my twitter public, and was outspoken about things I cared about, like reproductive healthcare. You may be familiar with Matt Walsh, who works with The Daily Wire (their big name is Ben Shapiro), but he is a monster. Unhappy with some of my tweets on abortion, he started taking pictures of myself and my baby brother (who he assumed was my son) and saying things like, “So you think it would be perfect okay to kill your son?” It freaked me out so badly that my social media is all on private now!
Since I’ve done this, I definitely spend much less time engaging with people who don’t deserve my time or energy. The only downside is that people who don’t follow me won’t see my tweets if I want to tweet at them, but I think I can live with that.
This is so great :)
I have this piece of advice I often give to people that work with me or in my personal life when they are dealing with someone less than pleasant (excuse language): remember that you only need to deal with them being an arsehole for the period of your required interaction, but they have to be a cunt forever and thats actually really sad.
What the hell is Twitter about? I don't get it. How can people posting not be actual people? All this retweeting, blocking and unblocking. What is it's point. Am I really dumber than I think because I just don't get it. If conspiracy theorists can work it out why can't I?
I think this is why I enjoy the comments section on your newsletters so much. It's just so straight forward. #its probablybecauseimoldbutimnotactuallythatild😉
Doing a disservice to toddlers there mate. Most toddlers I know are more open minded and it only takes a biscuit to convince them to change their mind. Although I'm right now trying to convince one that this container doesn't have a door so I can't "open the door" because there isn't one because it's a container 🙄🙄🙄
A good point re not starting up an interaction because of the audience you draw to them. Probably counts more for people who actually have followers. Also a good point to check the account for any posts that reflect that they might actually be a human with >1 interest.
I admit the laughing emojis get to me. Like, the person is so fucking smug about their ignorance. You give them an article that contradicts the claim they're trying to make and they laugh at it, and your quoted excerpt from it, before they've even had a chance to read it. It's so....RUDE.
Ok I had better get that biscuit before the screaming starts.
I did engage with one of these one-issue conspiracy theorists on Twitter last year. He assured me that the long-term side-effects of the vaccine will start showing up in me soon enough. So I’ve set an annual, reoccurring reminder to give him an update on any ailments I might have picked up over the previous 12 months. Can’t wait to update him on my pulled calf muscle and to see if he thinks that was caused by the vaccine.
Also on Yellowjackets - the night after we watched the pilot, my wife was sleep-talking and said "Melanie's role would be an interesting one to play". So it definitely grabbed us.
Thanks David, another great start to another beautiful day in Aotearoa. Talking of toddlers, we brace ourselves for more stupid protests and junk mail as Voices For Freedom & other idiots ramp up their attacks on the vax children campaign starting nationwide today.
I needed to hear this today! A case I’ve been involved in was wrapped up on Monday and ALL the major media outlets covered it and tweeted/Facebook/news articles everywhere and I found myself reading every single comment and the temptation to reply has been overwhelming, after I realised I’d read 400 replies on one tweet and all the quote tweets and their replies I knew it was time to stop but in this case the sheer amount of victim blaming and people not actually reading the full article was so overwhelming, I can’t imagine what that’s like for you and others in the public eye who will have literally every post scrutinised, you’re a lot more resilient than I am!
Hope you have a great week and enjoyed your horse riding!!
Re: Melanie Lynskey. I had no idea she was a kiwi. She nails the American accent and our behavior. Kudos to her, she’s brilliant.
David's post and the other commenting here read like the wise advice of a true social media veterans, those with the scorch marks to show for it. I've never been that much involved with either Twitter or Facebook posts before my engagement with Webworm. It's been an... education.
On one level, engaging has been something of a source of personal and professional curiosity. I now understand the pull and the dopamine-fueled compulsiveness of it all, but if I'm being honest, I don't think I've achieved much of anything beyond that. And I hadn't considered the 'followers seeing the replies' effect. Bleah - who wants THAT noise.
On balance, by not engaging previously, I don't think I was missing that much and both me and the twittersphere are likely far better off if I largely don't. So this was timely advice.
I actually don't do twitter often because it tends to be these one to two para reactive comments that either say nothing or not enough in many cases. The rabid ones are more likely to do this for sure and, if bots, incapable of anything else. On FB though, my inner stirrer emerges and while I don't necessarily engage, I have been known to put up the odd eye roll emoji, or face palm gif, just to give them something to have a screaming fit about and to then ignore or block them. Drives them nuts. It makes me feel slightly better for an instant about having to see some of the the bullsh*t they are spouting. 🙄😏
Really good advice. I dared to laugh at the Manosphere a week ago, the replies were fun, and they tried hard to make me discuss it. I wouldn't, the OP was biologically incorrect information about male and female sex organs (women's wombs are full of loneliness and death apparently 🙄). Nothing to discuss, facts are facts, plus I know it's a waste of time. Most of the time I resist the temptation to rattle idiot boxes but every now and again I can't help myself. As I get older I have much more control over the impulse to react to bollocks online.
What's that old saying, answer a fool and become a fool yourself?
Read a Science article a few years back looking at reward systems of the human brain. It took these classic rewards systems and compared the Endorphins to classic A Class Drugs, Sex and what triggers them in us as Primates and the the links to addiction that govern us, the usual stuff.
What was interesting was their research into Dogmatic types of people who are addicted to arguing as their brain is locked in the 'Pleasure Reward' cycle, Drug, Sex equivalent chemicals drowning their brain ... Kinky.
Thus l have side stepped street evangelical types with that crazy look in their eye, spittle on their lip and spiritual bulge in their pants.
l think modern discourse online is very similar, not really sharing, debate of ideas, something else entirely.
Twitter is addictive.
I completely recognise the impulses these replies give; they press us in the exciting values part of the brain and we get a lot of stimulation out of them.
If we respond, and if these people are people and not something else - then all we do by responding is to feed their addiction right back. This is looping feedback and, like microphone feedback, it gets louder and higher pitched. A solution is to turn down the volume. Not responding is a kindness to yourself and to them.
Otherwise, they get more entrenched, we get more entrenched, and together we tug in opposing ways on the fabric that weaves society together.
All addictions have a way of preventing you from contemplating ending them. If quitting twitter is too much to contemplate (I understand, been there), they have a feature where you can *suspend* your account, just to see what it is like. I can recommend it.
Haha Joe Rogan shifting those goalposts right at the end there… classic.
I think I missed the memo explaining social media is for engaging with people you don't know, cos I have never done so, despite being an early adopter of various platforms over the years. Went on Twitter about a decade ago cos it seemed like what a good activist did and completely failed to see the point of it so left soon after. So grok everything you say above, as strangers gossiping and bantering and hating should be seen by everyone as just irrelevant to your life.
Loved this! Such a brilliant reminder about checking before you engage and deciding on whether it’s worth it (usually not). But that tweet re Rogan…absolute gold! Normally I’d avoid anything to do with him, but that was totally worth it. Happy Monday!!
Accusing you of hate speech, of all things. Cue The Office’s Michael Scott quote, “Well I hated it a lot.”
I think this guessing game is a much healthier form on non/engagement! I used to keep my twitter public, and was outspoken about things I cared about, like reproductive healthcare. You may be familiar with Matt Walsh, who works with The Daily Wire (their big name is Ben Shapiro), but he is a monster. Unhappy with some of my tweets on abortion, he started taking pictures of myself and my baby brother (who he assumed was my son) and saying things like, “So you think it would be perfect okay to kill your son?” It freaked me out so badly that my social media is all on private now!
Since I’ve done this, I definitely spend much less time engaging with people who don’t deserve my time or energy. The only downside is that people who don’t follow me won’t see my tweets if I want to tweet at them, but I think I can live with that.